Are you stressed? Do you want to be?

If you think you're stressed then why not ask yourself the question "Do I want to be stressed". You see, a little stress is considered useful and if you're ok with your stress level then perhaps you shouldn't worry too much.

If you answer is "No" then the good news is that everything is in your control. You don't have to be stressed if you don't want to be. You have a choice and before responding to events you can choose a response or behaviour that make everything less stressful.

I am not looking to tell you how. My experience is that there's many sources of information that will tell you what to do and how to do it as long as you wish to find out. For me the most difficult bit was to realise that it is possible and it is up to me, not to the others, not to circumstances, not to uncontrollable events, not to genes, not to education or background but just up to me.

Just a simple question requiring a positive answer - Do I want to be stressed?

Rushing

We wake up and we're rushing to get ready and get out of the door. We are then rushing to get to work (or to school and then to work) where we are rushing to get through our emails and morning tasks. We may even rush through breakfast, have it at our desks and perhaps not even notice it. Then we rush for coffee ( or tea if you're special), have a couple of quick chats but don't really have time for deeper conversations and we are back at our desks rushing through more emails, meetings and reports.

We are then rushing to get a sandwich and have it at our desk while reading the news or more emails. Our afternoon is very similar with mor emails, meetings and reports an perhaps another coffee (or tea if you're special). Before we know it it is time to rush back home.

And there we are rushing to prepare diner and clean and wash and rush through bath time and the however many good nights we have to say. It finally feels like we can stop rushing so we sit and rush through a glass of wine (or perhaps water) while having a rather chaotic exchange of thoughts and quick plans with the wife or husband and then it is all over. We feel it's been a busy day and we did a lot. We may also feel that time flies and we find it difficult to understand why.

If this resonates with you then stop. Stop eating your sandwich or whatever else you might be doing right now. Stop and take a deep breath. Do it slowly and repeatedly. Focus on the quiet. Focus on the nothing. Focus on your breath. Try not to think about anything but your breathing in and breathing out.

How did that feel?

The skill of mindfulness

I will not be explaining what mindfulness is in these lines as it has been already superbly explained by many. I would just note that the word has sometimes been misused but it is easy to find the true meaning.

What I am going to talk about is why the skill if mindfulness is not more common? Why are we not educating everyone to practice mindfulness? Why our world has not yet realised the potential of mindfulness and made use of it?
Just imagine a world with a lot less violence, a world with a lot less crime, a world with a lot less cheating, a world with a lot less fraud, a world with much more love and compassion. Can you?

If you can or if you can't but think it would be good then that's great. Then you can help make it happen by discovering and practicing mindfulness and by helping others discover it. Why aren't more people helping?

If you can't or think this is how the world is and you love it then you have some way to go. You need to look at yourself and consider your life. You need to look around you and recognise the violence in the world. Understand that it must stop.

Perhaps only then, only after a critical mass of people are capable of making the step towards compassion we could start building the better world. The one with less crime, less violence, less fraud, less cheating and much more love.

The path to success

Whatever you do do it responsibly. And make it count. Just good is not good enough. People will no longer spend money or even time on your "thing" unless it is exceptional or you're way too lucky. ( If you're too lucky you don't need to read this for now). And most things that are exceptional and last do so because they are made in the most responsible way possible.

Some tell us it is all about the value things provide. However in today's world you get very little time to attract attention. More often than not this time is not enough for people to discover the value of your product therefore your chance of capturing attention is by being remarkable.

Once you get people's attention then it is about value. And your "thing" must be good. Very few can get it right with just good effort. Which is why the second ingredient is to do things in the most responsible way known. And yes it is your responsibility to discover what that means in your present time.

If you care enough - make change happen

Things are what they are. Accept this as a fact. I don't suggest you should give up. But making others aware of how unhappy you are about things as they are is unlikely to make any difference. And more often than not you are welcome to make that difference.

The only thing is - you would need to learn how to approach it so that it works. And that I am not suggesting is easy yet it is possible. If you just complain this is unlikely to have positive impact. There are tried and successful strategies for making change work - find one and use it. And as part of it find support - it is a step in most of the change strategies anyway.

So stop moaning and make things happen Things are what they are. Accept this as a fact. If you care enough then be the one who makes the difference or else shut up and don't moan (it gets annoying).